“Don’t test me, bitch. I can beat your ass in Trivia Crack.”

“Rather than wastin’ your energy throwin’ your little ‘woe is me, pity me’ party, how about you take it and apply it to the things you wanna change? I can only be sympathetic to a certain point; it’s gettin’ old real quick now.”

“Buy a fuckin’ vowel, some punctuation, and some silence. You talk too much.”

“– Hey, uh… I know this a bad time – like ten at night, I know – but I was wonderin’ if I could borrow your power drill real quick…? It won’t take very long, I promise.”

“– I can spot a funny look from a mile away, hon. What’s eatin’ at you?”

“You better calm down before I kick your ass and run the risk of losin’ a heel.”

“You don’t need a goddamn permission slip to be honest with me, bitch. If you have somethin’ to say, just say it.”

“Y'wanna know what I’m doin’ tomorrow?! – Not wastin’ my time with FIFA, that’s for damn sure.”

“– Your eyes are gonna roll right outta your sockets if you keep starin’ like that.”

“You cannot give a child edible panties in place of a goddamn fruit snack! What the fuck were you even thinking?!”